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“I tell ya, I don’t get no respect”, are famed words from the immortal Rodney Dangerfield, the man who made self-effacing comedy an art form. His list of accomplishments as a stand-up funnyman is long and his work is forever beloved… 70 Tonite Show appearances with Johnny Carson, 45 Merv Griffin Show appearances, 28 Dean Martin Show appearances, 16 Ed Sullivan Show appearances, 22 movie roles, 20 Miller Lite Beer commercials, and the owner of Dangerfield’s nite club in New York City. He was loved and respected by everyone television, movies and of course, the world of stand-up comedy.

So, to brighten your day, we give you a side-splitting sampling of some of Rodney’s very best…

My doctor says I’m in bad shape – I wanted a 2nd opinion and he said, ok, you’re ugly, too! So, the doc told me to walk 5 miles a day for a week. I called him and said, “Hey doc, I did what you said but I’ve got a real problem – I’m 35 miles from house!… One time I met the surgeon general. He offered me a cigarette… My old man told me to never take candy from a stranger, unless he offered me a ride… When I was born, I got no respect. The doctor told my mother, “I did all I could, but he pulled through anyway… Last Christmas I got no respect. I gave my kid a BB gun. He gave me a sweatshirt with a bulls eye in the back… My kid, he drives me nuts. For three years now he goes to a private school… he won’t tell me where it is… Oh I tell ya, with sex, my wife thinks twice before she turns me down. Once in the morning and once at night… Nothing works out. I bought an Apple computer. There was a worm in it!”

Actually, it may have been Jay Leno, who said it best about Rodney Dangerfield… “He was quite simply the greatest stand-up comedian there ever was.”

~ Fitz Jerraboam